a normal sacrifice...

Recently over breakfast, a friend lamented that while many people around her recognized the sacrifice she was making daily to follow Jesus, she saw little real sacrifice in lives around her.

“It’s like gay and trans people make sacrifices, but what about the average straight folks in church? Shouldn’t sacrifice be the norm for all of us?”

Her question was not rhetorical (she genuinely wanted to dialogue), but it was also not easily answerable.

Twenty years ago, I, my husband, and a close friend read the biography of Amy Carmichael. Our overwhelming “take home” was the question: what are we sacrificing to follow Jesus? As I led the youth group at our church, I was surrounded by teens who thought a sacrifice was rising a few minutes early to be with Jesus. It was a tremendous sacrifice for them to give up a week’s pay at Taco Bell to serve on our summer missions project. These were sacrifices for them, to be sure, but they’re small compared to Jesus asking for our whole lives.

I’m reading through the gospels, and they are littered with instances of Jesus calling us to:

Follow—sacrificing the place I am sitting

Sacrifice—giving up something that He deems necessary for me to give up

Obey—sacrificing going my own way and instead choosing His way

Make disciples— sacrificing a lot of time and energy to effectively multiply myself

In fact, He says several times that the only way to demonstrate that we love and know Him is to obey His commands. He says that we will forfeit some earthly relationships. He says that people may not understand our choices and our decisions. He says that when He calls, I must stand up and begin to walk where He is calling. 

If some of this doesn’t sting, I wonder if we have given to Jesus but not really sacrificed.

That’s the conclusion that I came to those twenty years ago. I gave what many saw as a lot as I walked with Jesus. I gave tons of time, piles of energy, copious amounts of food and beverages, as well as a regular tithe. 

But as I sat with Shawn (my husband) and Mike (our friend—you can read more of his story here) talking about sacrifice, I could not recall any actual “hurt” in what I was giving. At least not in the way that I was reading in that missionary biography and others. We were raising small children at the time, and I wanted them to see these principles worked out in our routine, daily lives.

Recently, I spent nine days with friends and family who are living and working abroad to share the good news of the gospel with an unreached people. There was obvious sacrifice involved in that choice, including daily, routine, small sacrifices that could largely go unseen if you didn’t sit and spend a while with them.

I wrote earlier this Spring about hearing Mark Yarhouse speak at the Revoice conference about his recently released book, A Costly Obedience. He highlighted his research regarding sexual minorities striving to live out their faith following the traditional sexual ethic of the Church that says marriage is between a man and a woman and sex happens inside that covenanental union. There is obvious sacrifice in being celibate and single or choosing to enter a mixed-orientation marriage. 

The topic of sacrifice gets airplay. But is it getting worked out in your life and mine? And why does it matter?

In my life, the people that I am generally walking alongside are gender and sexual minorities. There may be different people in your life. (At least I hope that there is, because we are all commanded to make disciples.) For me to have a chance to speak into their situation and the sacrifice they are making regarding their gender and sexuality, my life must resonate with theirs. Sacrifice must be evident in and around me, alongside them and on their behalf.

At one point, my friend that I was sharing breakfast with pounded her hand on the table and said,

“Where I am sacrificing is obvious, what about you? Where is following Jesus costly for you? This needs to be normal for all of us”. 

Church—Bride of Christ—is sacrifice normative in your body of believers? Have you examined your own life in this area? Ask Jesus if there are areas that he would have you sacrifice in.