my first thought...

I was walking into the grocery store this week when I heard the unmistakable sound of metal crashing with metal. I swung my head around to see a man flying and then rolling across the street. My nursing background has trained me to be a bystander that gets involved so I pulled out my phone to call 911 and jogged to the street.

A motorcyclist had been hit by a car, the motorcycle was crumpled by the side of the road and the man was awake with a large, bleeding,  head wound, sirens were screaming towards us, and another nurse had arrived as well.

As I ended the call with 911, a random man walked up to me and started into a long monologue about how “stupid” this man had been. Blah, blah, blah...idiot...foolish. 

I stared at the man astounded that he had so many judgements to share with a complete stranger and almost yelled back, “did you mean to say this man was an image-bearer of God?” But instead I turned away with no reply. Realizing that I could be quick to judge this man(also an image bearer of the living God)  who had been quick to judge… Ahhh, the cycle of judgement. None of us is exempt or non impacted!

I reflected all that evening on how quick I, we, are to make instant judgements. And how those judgements separate us from others even in our mental space. Sometimes I am quick enough to stop my words from spurting out and examine my thoughts. The man at the accident will be a good object lesson for me for probably a while to come.

 I wrote last week about how we really need a fleet of believers in Jesus ready and willing to walk alongside sexual and gender minorities- especially young people. But too often, I believe, we are quick to judge instead of being quick to listen and observe. We see the way that a person dresses, presents themselves, what they call themselves, and we turn away without ever knowing them.

Really I think we fear what other believers or church folk will think of us if we are seen or associate with “obvious sinners”. I use such a ridiculous statement as an “obvious sinner”- because in our left brains we know that we are all “obvious sinners”. We are all equally in need of Christ’s atoning blood and redemption.

I think we are quick to judge because we want people to know that we do not condone sin. We do not want to be within one hundred feet of condoning sin! But that one hundred feet keeps us from loving people in the ways that Jesus did and wants us to do. Our fear of others and our reputation, and our self righteousness, keeps us from making efforts to love well.

What does it look like to walk alongside of someone?

It means spending time. It will cost you time.

It will take effort. You will have to pursue, ask questions, and be genuinely interested.

And of utmost importance is a willingness to listen without judgement. To genuinely hear.

James admonishes us to be quick to listen and slow to speak. 

That doesn’t mean that we never speak. 

That doesn’t mean that we are spineless and without values.

When I clearly know what I believe and why I believe it, I’m not afraid to let someone share their thoughts. I don’t have to lead with my opinions. I can engage your ideas, values, and thoughts. I don’t have to yell, “yuck, stop that” with my words or my actions or my facial expression. 

Really, I think we have a trust problem. I, we, do not really believe that the Holy Spirit is capable of leading in the person sitting across from me.

I must make you understand what I believe is sin.

And I must show those around me that I do not condone your sin.

Jesus associated with drunkards and sinners. And yes, people talked and accused Him. 

They way that I figure it, I’m in good company when who I’m standing next to raises eyebrows. 

It’s worth it to me to stand next to someone and value them.